RE: climbing chain link fence

[khlc04]

I'm not very good at scaling chain link fence, partly because I'm not one of the ubiquitous rock climbing/BASE jumping hybrids out there, and partly because I'm a fat boy. So the other day I went to the hardware store and bought a couple 4" x 4" steel angle brackets drilled for (2) 3/8" bolts on each side. I put (2) 3/8" stove bolts through one side and on each bolt I put a 3/8 x 1-1/2" fender washer jammed between two hex nuts. Now, to use this device, one just inserts the bolt and washer assemblies through the diamonds in the fence so that the washers are behind the mesh and then slide the device down so that the everything locks into place. Joila! Instant temporary step. I found the two steps I fashioned to be a very stable platform for climbing the fence. Coupled with a small piece of carpet folded over the barbed wire, the whole tresspassing experience became very quick and easy. Why make breaking the law any more difficult than it has to be? I had the luxury of leaving everything there until I jumped down, but for $5 in parts, it could have just as easily been abandoned in place if retreival was impractical. Does not damage fence.

I also discovered neoprene gloves for tower climbing. I would highly recommend the Northwest Territory brand "Neoprene Sport Glove" available at Big K-Mart for $10. Velcro closure at the wrist, excellent tactile qualities, positive grip on each wrung. Much better than leather work gloves for climbing. Seem like they would be ideal for cold weather skydiving, as well.

If these kind of tricks are common knowledge, then I wish more of it was disseminated in this forum.

cya,
Chris Koehler

[guest]

is this for real?

[guest]

Interesting observations. This is a problem I have puzzled over extensively.

I find that banging nails through the soles of my boots give me the necessary purchase to climb allmost anything. Obviously the nails need to go from the inside out otherwise it is a bit uncomfortable. Also try sewing some sandpaper onto the palm of your gloves for extra grip.

I am currently working on a catapult system which will cut down on climbing and make the whole trespassing experience far more fun and adrenaline fueled. I have designed it to work from the back of a pick-up for more mobility and I'll be marketing it in the new year, anybody interested? Am I still breaking the law if I'm in and out in under 3 minutes? Perhaps a question for Fred Morelli.

Cya

Bobby

[guest]

Will this catapult system of yours work for launching cats?

[h00ktern]

Yes, but you have to hand it to him for ingenuity!

Whatever it takes.

Dave

[guest]

I'd like to buy a pair of your old boots & 1 catapult.
(Willing to swap or part exchange for smokescreen underpants?)

[guest]

I used to have a pair of smokescreen underpants but I shat myself so often during the catapult development phase that I had to dispose of them in the local hospitals sharps bin.

However there is a high security site that I'm planning to jump soon and I need an effective disguise. Therefore if you have any comedy spectacle/nose combos we may be able to do business.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Bobby

[guest]

I am also currently developing a system that will work for all your household pets. K-Mart have expressed an interest.

Cya

Bobby

[guest]

Who's climbin'? I just buy a bunch of ratty old cars, crash em' right thru' the fence and leave 'em at the base. No worries...Oh, be sure to put all your garbage in your car beforehand cuz it saves trips to the dump.
P.S. On my more frequently jumped local steel scrap, I put bathtub liner( the thingee strips that look like sand paper) at the exit point for a nice solid launch. That's about it for customizing my d.z.

[khlc04]

If you get your altitude with a catapult, haven't you taken the 'object' out of fixed object jumping? Hmmm... it's not an aircraft and not an object. Does that get you around the aerial delivery clause?

The style of the post was suppossed to be humorous, but seriously -- Try it. You'll like it. If anyone has tips for getting over a spool of razor wire (aside from the catapult), I'd be interested to know what they do.

This thread did come a long way to get to references to sh*tting ones pants, however.

[h00ktern]

I didn't see where he was advocating leaving signs of his presence; just that they "could have just as easily been left in place..." Lighten up; you'll live longer.

Dave Jones

[guest]

Hi Guys..I like this idea of the catapult...because of the secret nature of what we do why not disguise yourself as a household pet then fire youself to the top of the object....double whammy!!!Ive been trying to fire myself on top of a few things in the past without wearing a disguise and got caught red handed.Or was it red ended?

[guest]

I have one slightly soiled Groucho Marx (spectacles, eyebrows nose and moustache) ensemble. The cigar is missing but I think you could salvage. Alternatively, you could try a plastic handcuffs / rubber truncheon combo free of charge. It's risky though. They hit you hard for impersonating a cop.

[guest]

That brings me to report on my latest sport. Bungee climbing.
You start at the bottom of a climb tied on to an elastic rope which is binered to a post in the floor. The guy who climbs the highest is the winner. I won my first competition with ease.

My next competition is scheduled for fall 2005 by which time I should have healed.

[guest]

I feel that the eybrows would be over the top and make the disguise obvious, I know all too well what the concequences of this could be. I was busted late last year after attempting to enter a building disguised as Yoda.

However on a lighter note I have recently come into posession of one of those huge padded sumo wrestling costumes that you often see at crap parties. I thought that it may interest you as protective gear for bungee climbing.

Cya

Bobby